Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Live in love

The last few days have been overwhelming in every way possible. It has allowed me to do more thinking than I would like, and really made me think about the things in my life. I've always struggled with the fact that friends come and go. Accepting that the people who have the most influence on your life, are no longer a part of your life, just seems so sad. (for lack of a better word) I'm not trying to be or sound negative. The funny thing is that I have pushed so many people out of my life too.
 I am just realizing how much I want for so many to be happy, but I can never make everyone happy. I've tried so much to try to emotionally connect with people in order to truly understand them, and find ways to bring joy to others. But I have really just learned to understand myself. Seems so selfish, but I don't know any other way to be. I have come to realize that I cannot provide happiness to other people, but I do hope that people have at least felt some kind of joy, or happiness in knowing me. I feel that everyone that I have been in friendships, relationships, whateverships; all of the people that have been in and out of my life, I can say, you all have made me happy because you all have helped me to truly learn who I am. Regardless if I still speak to you or not. (something I'm learning to deal with) Thank you for bringing understanding and truth to my life. Knowing that, I can only be who I am, I will only be who I am, and I will learn to love others as much as I possibly can. Sometimes that is hard to do, but I will try my best to live in love. Love is something that I don't understand, and question always, but I always have the most comfort in. 
So to all, know that you are loved.

Sunday, November 22, 2009

tender illusions

Different times, wonderful moments.

tender illusion continued...

Love is the most tender illusion...

Old memories I never got to share, but enjoyed so very much.